Sunday, October 31, 2010

Poe's First Draft of 'The Raven'

The Dachshund
Once upon a midnight dreary as I plodded weak and weary
To my bed with visions full of Slumberland’s enchanted shore.
I was taking off my socks and suddenly I spied my dachshund
Curled up like a sleeping fox in just the space that I yearned for
“Move yourself off of my bed, please, I am weary and footsore”
Quoth the dachshund, “No. You snore.”

Startled by the stillness marked by such display of cheeky snark
Quickly did I point my finger toward the bedroom’s open door.
“Get thee hence, you little brat, I’ll take no sort of sass like that,
Upon my bed I’ll stretch out flat, my wearied senses to restore.
After all my toil I crave the yielding mattress’s contour.”
Quoth the dachshund, “Try the floor.”

I had scarce the strength to quibble, “Listen here, you know that kibble
That appears as if by clockwork in your dish upon the floor?
It does not grow on the trees, nor does the salve that wards off fleas,
So I would think you’d try to please the person who buys treats galore.
If I do not get my rest, I’ll not be going to the store.”
Quoth the dachshund, “You’re a bore.”

And the dachshund, never stirring, lay just like a kitten purring,
By my lack of will inferring his was now the winning score.
Anyone who owns a dachsie must concede they’re full of moxie,
Both directly and by proxy, your commands they will ignore.
Best admit that any chance of winning you long since foreswore.
You’re the master nevermore.

Photo: 'Halloween Dwyn' by Doug Watt.
Model: 'Dwyn'
Author: Jerry Stemnock for Dachshund Delights
Yes, we post this almost every year at this time, but you can never get too much of a good thing. Have a fun and safe Halloween!
So long Dachtober.


Whit said...

This is the first time I've seen this poem, and I absolutely LOVE it!

curator said...

Yes, I'd never seen this either, and I LOVE IT!! What a riot!
Happy Halloween!

Bludog said...

Two dewclaws up!

Keren Hening said...

" I would rather train a striped zebra to balance on an Indian club than induce a dachshund to heed my slightest command." E. B. White

Anonymous said...

Excellent! An enjoyable Halloween read.

Taffy said...

Well, I don't see why the owner thinks the doxie should leave the bed! That is animal cruelty! Momma and Daddy say I have a bit of an attitude too ;o)
I hope you got loads of treats today! Happy Howlowiener!

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